Relationships

wow relationships. how difficult they can be. we believe that this is the ultimate prize and nothing, I mean nothing will match the feelings of bliss I will receive from being in love with my perfect mate. To feel safe, secure and trusting in someone else with all my inner thoughts and feelings is a scary proposition. To become vulnerable with someone to the point of letting them into that space that no one has been before requires immense courage and faith in the other person. we strive so hard to find the ideal partner and yet can find it so disappointing when our desires or expectations are not met. It can be so painful at the other extreme.
so how do we know when this is the right person?
this is a big question and I feel it is best answered by "am i the right person".
It can be difficult enough living with myself at times let alone living with another person. I have been influenced by my socialisation ie family of origin. society, friends, schooling etc etc all this has constructed me as well as my experiences thus far in life. now my prospective partner has had equal but different experiences on their side so when we meet in is like 2 worlds colliding not 2 individuals getting together.

there are 2 questions we inadvertently ask ourselves through life
the first is "where am I going"
the second is "who's coming with me" if we get these around the wrong way we will find ourselves in trouble. as i will be at the whim and the pull of the other who is leading the way. I need to know who I am, where I am going and how I am going to get there and then look around for who is coming with me. Sometimes we do the opposite and get these questions in reverse with "who"s coming with me" then "where are we going". This can cause lots of issues later on in the relationship.

this will do for this blog
i will look at "who am I" next