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Relationship Counselling: Dealing with Conflicts in a Relationship

Feb 04, 2023

Conflict in a relationship is inevitable.

Dealing with conflicts in a relationship - Cooks Hill Counselling

Getting in fights with your significant other isn’t fun, but if you’re in a relationship it’s bound to happen at some point. If this happens, don’t panic! Here are some tips on how to deal with conflicts in your relationship to prevent from destroying the positive feelings you have towards your partner. The first step towards resolving conflict between partners is to understand what the conflict involves and whether it can be easily resolved or not.


What Is Conflict In a Relationship?


You will experience conflicts at some point, and you'll need to know how to deal with them. Knowing what a
conflict is can help you figure out the best way to handle it and make sure it doesn't get worse. A conflict is an issue that needs to be solved and resolved. But sometimes it can get so bad that one person wants to end the relationship altogether. It's important not to ignore these feelings and try instead to work through things together. You should give a chance to resolve the Conflicts in a relationship before making any decisions about relationship status. 


How To Deal With The Conflicts In a Relationship


Conflicts in a relationship happen from time to time and it's important to know how to deal with them. Here are some tips for dealing with conflicts in a relationship that might help you the next time you're faced with one.


Talk It Out


Relationships are bound to have conflict. The key to overcoming conflict is
communication. Talk about everything for conflict resolution and try to see things from the other person's point of view. You don't always have to be right, but it's important to understand where your partner is coming from so that you can come up with a compromise together. If you're too angry or stressed out, take time for yourself before talking it out again. These are some tips to resolve conflicts in a relationship while talking to your partner:


1) Listen actively by giving the speaker eye contact and repeat what they say to show you were listening. 

2) Use 'I' statements to express how you feel rather than attacking them back; I felt icky when I found out you left work early is better than You should have told me! 

3) Don't use words like 'always', 'never' or 'always'

4) Don't blame, accuse or criticise. 

5) Avoid yelling as much as possible; instead, speak at a lower volume while maintaining eye contact.

6) Try to understand why someone feels that way even if they're wrong (it could just be because of different opinions).

7) If your feelings are hurt, talk about how that makes you feel without saying anything offensive (you'll only get madder)


Relationship Counselling - Cooks Hill

Define The Conflict


Conflict is something you should always prepare for in a relationship. The question is not whether you will have conflict but how you'll deal with it when it arises. You may be able to resolve the problem quickly and easily or the conflict may linger and grow. Here are some steps to take in order to minimise the impact of conflicts on your relationship. 


1) Define what the problem is

2) Identify the causes, including possible solutions

3) Consider which resolution might work best for both people involved

4) Determine which option is easiest to implement and monitor

5) Develop an agreement about how to communicate effectively about any future issues

6) Choose a time frame for implementing any resolutions

7) Work together collaboratively until the issue is resolved.


Set Some Ground Rules


It's important to have rules in place to deal with conflicts in your relationship. These ground rules should be agreed on by both parties and make sure you're both happy with them. Here are some examples of ground rules for different types of conflict:


1) If one person is making more money than the other, they might pay more towards rent or expenses.


2) The decision about what constitutes cheating should be made before entering into the agreement. 


Conflicts in Relationships - Cooks Hill Counselling

Seek Professional Help Resolving Conflicts


If the conflicts that you and your partner are experiencing are negatively affecting your relationship, it is important to seek professional help. Counselling can be a way for you to explore and resolve issues with each other. It is also an opportunity for you to talk about the things that you may not feel comfortable talking about in front of your partner.


There is no one size fits all solution for what will work best for your relationship. A counsellor will address the root of the problem, rather than just trying to cover up the symptoms of a conflict. Contact us today to organise a session.

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